Wednesday, September 11, 2013

What if the Book of Mormon had been written by Dr Seuss?

I came across this and found it funny. (Click HERE to see it on the web.) I hope those of you who are of my faith find this funny as well. You do have to admit that it tells the story of Lehi and his family quite well up to the point of Lehi's vision of the Tree of Life.



Nephi: Of goodly parents I was born. I've never drunk, I've never sworn. This is Lehi, he's my dad. Laman, Lemuel, they are bad! And who is this? Why this is Sam

Sam: Yes, this is Sam; Sam I am. 

Laman: That Sam I am, that Sam I am I do not like that Sam I am. 

Sam: In a tent my father dwelt.

Lemuel: And it's so hot, I think I'll melt. Our father's brain is out of what,

Laman: Yeah, it's too hot, I'm going back.

Lehi: Then go and get the plates my dear.

Laman: On second thought, I'm staying here.

Nephi: You said you'd leave and go away, Now all you want to do is stay?

Lemuel: That Nephi always gets his way! 

Laman: Here we are in this damp cave.

Sam: We would not be here if you'd behave!

Nephi: I will go and I will do... There's an angel, that's my cue. Laban's had too much to drink. Now he'll lose his head I think. Look what I found, a brother from the quorum. 

Sam: We will take him home, we'll call him Zoram.

Laman: Our gold and silver we have spent. I do not like it in this tent.

Lemuel: I cannot read the Liahona. I must have drunk too much Corona.

Laman: We hate it here, we have no lives.

Lehi: Then go back to the city and get some wives. A tree, a tree, I see a tree!! The fruit is white, the fruit is free. A floating building, could it be? Why do they laugh and stare at me? Laman, Lemuel, come and see!

Laman: We will not eat your precious fruit. 

Lemuel: We will not wear a tie and suit. 

Laman: We will not help you build your boat. 

Lemuel: We do not think that it will float. 

Laman: No not this boat, it will not float. Not even in a shallow moat. I do not care what Nephi wrote.

Lemuel: We will not eat your fruit I say. 

Laman: We will not eat it on a tray. 

Lemuel: Aand we won't eat it in a tent, not even if your clothes are rent. 

Laman: We'd rather have a can of spam, we will not eat it, Sam I am. 

Sam: You do not like it, so you say, try it, try it, and you may. Try it and you may I say. 

Laman: Sam, if you will let us be, we will try it, you will see.

Lemuel: Say, we like this fruit of life!, sorry that we caused such strife. You've saved us from an awful jam, Thank you, Thank you, Sam I am

No comments:

Post a Comment